This paper attempts to illustrate how consultations and responses regarding extramarital affairs are accomplished, based on the analysis of newspaper advice columns. To establish the “consult-ability” of their trouble, the consulters blame themselves, portray their emotions and behaviors as beyond their own control, and talk about “moral trouble” that they cannot put an end to their current marriage which is no longer “righteous”, and start a brand new marriage life which would be more “righteous”. It further depends on the evaluation of the “moral value” of their extramarital relationship and current marriage in terms of romantic love ideology, whether the consultants advise consulters to bring the affair to an end or to start a brand new marriage life. In other words, the response that acknowledges that the consulter can maintain their extramarital affair and continue with their current marriage at the same time is quite exceptional and is treated as such. In these ways, consultations and responses regarding extramarital affairs, which are deviant in terms of romantic love ideology, are made intelligible by the norm itself. Although there are some limitations, these results are meaningful in that they locate romantic love ideology which has been considered to be an important constituent of the “Modern Family” in concrete practices.
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